People are born with a pair of eyes, used to observe the world. You might exclaim something like:
Wow! Her public speaking skills are amazing! She shows no stage fright at all. I wish I could be like that.
Wow! His singing is so beautiful! His voice is unique and bright. I wish I could sing like that.
Wow! Her legs are so slender! Not a bit of extra fat. I wish my legs looked like that
....
Our eyes have seen so much, yet it seems they alone cannot see ourselves, cannot see that we inherently possess unique treasures. We keep looking outward, learning, envying, but in the end, we miss our own true selves.
This phenomenon of being 'unable to see oneself' is referred to in psychology as a 'metacognitive blind spot' — the brain's default mode network constantly processes various external information automatically but rarely actively constructs a panoramic awareness of the self. Just as our visual cortex automatically filters out the presence of our nose when we use our eyes, we also tend to overlook our innate traits in the inertia of daily life.
So, how can we learn to 'see ourselves'?
1. Conduct 'embodied cognition' exercises
Place your hands over your heart and feel the warmth of your palms permeate your chest. Experiments at Stanford University have shown that this simple act of bodily empathy can activate the brain's mirror neuron system, allowing you to respond to yourself with the same gentle understanding as you would to a close friend. At this moment, anxiety signals from the amygdala diminish, while the self-compassion areas in the anterior cingulate cortex become active. Truly feel yourself, sense the strength within, and practice self-compassion—when you truly see yourself, those qualities that were once underestimated are waiting to be illuminated by the light of awareness.
2. Cultivating a Growth Mindset
Record three small achievements each day, no matter how trivial. Research in positive psychology has found that doing this practice consistently for six weeks can increase the number of new neurons in the hippocampus by 17%. These new neural synapses gradually build a bridge to self-worth, helping us see ourselves more objectively and recognize the overlooked mental treasures. This is not a placebo effect; it is your own neural plasticity at work.
3. Establish the perspective of the 'observing self'
Take 5 minutes each day to practice third-person meditation (you can accompany it with a light tapping rhythm on your knees). Neuroscientists at Yale University have found that when people refer to themselves as 'he/she,' the activity of the default mode network decreases by 42%. This psychological distance can effectively break the cycle of rumination. It's like viewing your life landscape from a drone's perspective; the inner resources that are obscured by the fog of emotions—your resilience, creativity, and unique life experiences—gradually emerge into focus.
Existential psychology emphasizes that individual growth is essentially a continuous process of discovering and becoming oneself. However, in today's fast-paced era, people often fall into the trap of 'others' expectations,' losing direction while pursuing external success. At this time, 'seeing oneself' acts like a compass, helping us find the path we truly love.
Seeing oneself is not an insight that occurs overnight; it is a lifelong endeavor that requires continuous practice. Only by clearly understanding our true selves, genuinely accepting our strengths and weaknesses, and respecting the desires and fears within, can we gradually lift the veil from our hearts, achieve spiritual awakening, and find inner peace and a sense of life’s purpose in a noisy world. After all, it is only by illuminating the corners of our inner world first that we can better embrace the external world.
So, please turn your gaze back to yourself, see your own treasures, and return to your true self. Believe firmly: your light will surely fill the sky!